New OpeningsNovember 10, 2017
The Fault in our Educational SystemNovember 22, 2017
Social Media has been on fire since it was reported that Maryam Sanda allegedly killed her husband, stabbing him several times. Multiple reports stated that she attacked him based on allegations of infidelity after seeing a text message on his phone. She is said to have stabbed him thrice in the back and several times in his groin. She drove him to the hospital for treatment after stabbing him but he did not survive. Some reports stated that she had bitten his finger, some stated it was his ear that same day and Bilyamin Bello was treated at a hospital before returning home. Some report stated he was advised to leave the house but he refused, only to be brutally attacked the second time. The couple had a daughter together. We still don’t have a full picture of what happened. But one thing we are sure of is; on the morning of Sunday, 19th November 2017, Bilyamin was stabbed to death and his wife is the prime suspect. If the court finds Maryam guilty of murder, I really hope she faces the punishment for killing her husband in cold blood. I will say this over and over again, there is no justification for killing anyone.
After the dust has settled, and those sharing pre-wedding pictures and wedding videos of the couple are done doing that (I have no clue as to what they are trying to achieve), and the various curses that have been hurled at Maryam are done landing on her, I hope we take out time to reflect on how we collectively treat women as we deem fit and as properties to be acquired. I wish we can for once stop asking women to settle for anything in marriages in the name of nobody’s marriage is perfect. I really hope society begins to frown at men who cheat the same way it frowns at women who cheat. I hope we stop giving men the idea that women are spare tires rather than equals in marriages. I hope we stop blaming women for failed marriages and cheating husbands. I hope we begin to understand that a lot of women are frustrated and unhappy, and are time bombs waiting to explode in marriages.
When we are done doing that, I hope we rewire our orientation on how we raise our girls, and stop teaching them that marriage is the peak of their achievement and a failed marriage is always the fault of the woman. I wish we can for once start raising our girls to have voices and to know when to walk away from men that treat them without respect. And I hope we will accept that sometimes a marriage gets to a point where it stops working for both parties. Forget that story they tell you about staying in a marriage for the kids. The kids will come to understand.And for those playing Judge and Jury, life happened to Maryam, and life can happen to anyone of us. A few months ago, someone I knew from secondary school, whom I could vow could never hurt a fly was arrested for kidnapping. As we are throwing those curses, let’s remember that we are all humans and we all have our imperfections.